Dream Eaters B - Hank the Man

Hank was a man’s man. He believed in 3 things - a hard days work, cold beer, and the good lord. He lived a simple, honest life. But those damned bureaucrats didn’t agree, trying to slap him with laws, regulations, tax debts - you name it! Sure, he over-reported yields to maximise his corn subsidies, and then embezzled those excess profits. He might have breached some labour laws with all those migrant farm hands. But was this not the land of the free?

“I’ve had it!” Hank slammed his fist on the fence. “If the good lord blesses you with abundance, you have a responsibility to embrace it. I’m not gonna get bent-over by some latte-sipping, sissy-boy Government lawyer who wants turn all of our children into gay transexuals!” The cows stared at him blankly. "Enough talking - it's time for action!" Hank hopped in his pickup and headed into Arkham to give them a piece of his mind.

Hank can’t really remember how he joined this odd lot. He must have got lost on his way to the revenue office. There was some weird looking guy named Luke dressed in flashy clothes, and this strange woman who looked American but insisted she was born in India. Hank just didn’t understand these city folk. Ah well, at least he can take his anger out on some giant spiders, or something. Once he shows them whose boss, those Government spiders will be think twice before they second guess him again.